Dear Children ~

Dear Children of my womb,
Children I carried for 10 months and gave birth to by c-section.
Have I told you how much I love you whiney voice?
I just love how you think that whiney voice is going to get you what you want.

I apologize, I thought that surprising you with a lunch out after school would make you excited.
That waiting in a short line for one of our favorite meals would be worth it.
Forgive me for not realizing that you would have rather bickered and cried.
Had I known we would’ve just gone straight home.
I hope you understand that when we go places it’s because you are special to us
Sometimes Mommy and Daddy just want to treat you, “just because.”

I’m sorry that you felt that I owed you the meal
and that you didn’t believe me when I said for the 10th time
we’re going home if you don’t make better choices.
Didn’t think I’d actually pull you out of line, did you?
I even surprised myself a little.
I’m sorry that you chose to stop crying
as we arrived home and pulled in the driveway.
By then it was too late.
We were not turning around.

Dear woman standing in behind us,
Yes, I could feel your eyes blazing a hole into the back of my head
I could almost hear the judgement circling your head
as you watched my children continue to misbehave.
I should’ve asked you how I could’ve done it better.
Perhaps you don’t have children or you’ve forgotten
that they’re all young and pushing the boundaries at some point.
We’re a fallen world after all.
Just ask Adam and Eve.
I was set up millions of years ago to earn your judgement
and silent criticism.
Thanks for reminding me that I don’t have it all together.

Dear Gentleman in front of us.
Please, you telling me that you’re glad it’s not just your kid doesn’t make me feel better.
There’s one of me + 2 of them, the odds were not in my favor.
I think a simple smile would’ve made me feel better.
Maybe not, but none the less.

Dear Life,
thank you for the guilt that comes with knowing that their behavior is my fault.
It stems from not enough time with mommy because she works, right?
I’m sorry that I’m imperfect.
But I truly believe just like it has to be my choice to put on a happy face
My children need to do the same.
They need to learn grace, patience,
and that when mommy says stop or we’re leaving,
I mean stop, or we’re leaving.

I, however, am not going to apologize for leaving.
In that moment I taught my kids a powerful lesson.

Dear person reading this,
Some of you will agree with what I’m saying.
You’ve been there, you’ve done that.
Maybe you haven’t.
But before you leave a comment judging me for making my kids leave,
close the window.
I’ve had all the judgement I can take for now.

Dear Self,
Remember you’re going to look back on these days and realize
They’re the growing pains of life.
Your children are pushing boundaries because they need discipline.
At the end of the day, they love you and need you.
Don’t let others stares or judgement dissuade you.
Keep your eyes on Jesus + He’ll lead you as your raise them up.
Be encouraged! It will be better after nap time.
Be thankful they both still nap so you can enjoy this quiet time.

Dear Conscious,
You’re right, I’m already feeling better.
Now I think I shall reward myself with a cat nap.

Rags to Stitches Blog

Image Map